10.10.09 @ 4:08 pm
Doing Everything Wrong, God this time it’ll be different..
what in the world is going on with me? why am i this way?
i need to stop, i need to get myself together, fix my life, its falling apart again…
i’m falling through the cracks that i can barely make it by, my focus isn’t there, i’m all over the place…
what am i doing with myself? all i do, is not care, not care that i’m digging deeper into hell..
wheres my priorities? what happened to my life? why am i making the wrong choices?
i need to get my shit together…
i’m fat…so i need to lose weight…
i’m unheathy…so i need to exercise..
i’m bad eater…so i need to eat healthy
i’m tired…so i need to get better sleep…
i’m lazy…so i need to get motivation…
i’m stupid…so i need to study harder…
i’m distracted…so i need to focus…
i’m distant…so i need to get closer
i’m losing true friends… so i need to fight to keep them…
i’m nothing… so i need to make effort to be something…
i’m a turning away for “him”…so i need to find “him” again..
i’m missing church…so i need to go back to church..
i’m changing bad…so i need change good…
i’m lost…so i need to be found again…
i’m unhappy….so i need to be happy…
i’m lonely…so i need to fill that void…
this is the time…the time i get my act together before its too late…before i ruin my chances of living a better life…dear God please forgive me for falling way off the path you intended to me to follow, please forgive me for giving in to temptation..i need you God…i need you to help me be better…help me to change…help to to grow happy with you and with myself because i’m uhappy Lord…please give me the strength… i need you…i really need you…i’m sorry i truly mean it…this time woill be different, i have faith in you and i’ll try to have faith in myself, but i need your help… i’m fed up, i’ve had enough of my ignorance to greater life in you…i love you and always will…